Welcome

What does it mean to welcome someone?  Does your synagogue have a “new member welcome program?” How about a welcome program for all members? Is “welcoming” an environment, an activity or a one-size-fits-all program? As we struggle to understand the world we are living in today, we need to re-examine what “welcome” means. After all, we work very hard to create experiences and opportunities that will enhance our Jewish communities and deepen engagement; imagine if our efforts were lost due to hidden barriers to entry?

Steven M. Cohen, a sociologist who studies American Jews, recently conducted a survey commissioned by the Foundation for Jewish Camp. In an article on eJewish Philanthropy, I really saw the hidden barrier to welcoming interfaith couples.

“It’s not a question of open arms, it’s a question of a helping hand,” says Professor Cohen. Exactly. If it were your friend joining the synagogue, can’t you hear your friend telling you about the experience, saying, “They were welcoming, but...”

Give a helping a hand. We are stewards, not just greeters. Think of the buddy system and how effective that is for acclimating, promoting a sense of responsibility for others and learning together. The same is true for adults as for kids.

“Mommy, I see all these toys but I don’t know how to act,” a three-year-old named Noah, says, upon entering a gymnastics birthday party for the first time. This is something you may have seen your kids experience, or remember experiencing yourself.

Let’s say you invited your new neighbor to a dinner party at your home. How would you handle the welcome? I am sure that you would not just greet them at the door and then let them handle the rest of the evening on their own. As a good host, you would introduce your new neighbor to other guests, make sure they are seated with people that will be of interest to them. You would do everything you could to inject them into that scene and make sure that they engaged with others, in hopes that they will create a connection. Beyond just the smiles and pleasantries, and directions to the restrooms and exit doors, you would work to make personal connections and relationships with that new neighbor that could extend beyond that evening. Just like in membership engagement, we work to make personal connections and spiritual (dare I say religious) experiences extend beyond the synagogue walls.

What are the gateways into our communities? Is it like an exclusive velvet roped club? Welcoming doesn’t begin and end with overly zealous smiling ushers and handouts. Rather, we need to be a helping hand and offer a guide to navigate the room, the opportunities, the ways to participate and be heard. We need to create new gateways into our community through various learning opportunities, relationship-building activities and programs that respond to the needs and hopes of the community. And there are no dead ends in this path; each experience, or encounter with you or your organization leads to the next step. And each step has a welcoming foundation to it.

Creating engagement is not only an interfaith issue. This is an issue every Jewish organization (especially synagogues) has to come to terms with for every demographic. We all want to belong. The question is: What are we each going to do to create entryways into our community?